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Once Upon a Time in Mexico

Once Upon a Time in Mexico

“Squats don’t hurt your knees; what you are doing hurts your knees.”

Dan John


By the writing of this text, there were 1,789 homicides in Tijuana this 12 months. That’s exceeded the former 12 months’s record-high of one,781, with some other 3 extra months last in 2018. If you might be making plans a honeymoon or a fast getaway, most likely pass Tijuana off your listing. Back in 2004, it gave the impression of a fabulous position to wait an underground MMA tournament.


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In case you’ve got neglected ESPN for the ultimate 20 years, MMA stands for Mixed Martial Arts. You’re most likely extra acquainted with the dominant emblem: the UFC. In the early 2000’s, only a few states legalized MMA. Events had been confined to Indian casinos, bull rings, and again alleys. It did not lend a hand that many of the contests had been held inside of a cage. In 1996, the overdue Senator John McCain famously known as it, “Human Cockfighting.” He later warmed-up to the game.


I started blended martial arts in a while after highschool in Aliso Viejo, California. The teacher used to be a former UFC Champion, which supposed he used to be a deadly, badass killer. In my eyes, he used to be the hardest man in the arena, and I used to be in his faculty.


I keep in mind looking at my top notch to look if I used to be in becoming a member of. I watched two guys “spar” with an depth I would by no means observed ahead of. One child were given knocked out, and a other child dragged him away by means of the toes. I nearly rainy myself. What had I gotten myself into?


It wasn’t too overdue, I hadn’t signed the rest, but. All I had to do used to be sneak out, and nobody will be the wiser. But, I used to be ill and bored with getting driven round. I figured it used to be a rite-of-passage in faculty and idea it might finish all through school. I used to be flawed. So, I stayed glued to my chair looking at the carnage, and after magnificence, and signed up. Since I used to be too scared to do workforce categories, I would do personal courses. I knew I would get my ass kicked, the very last thing I sought after used to be to have an target audience.


Once Upon a Time in Mexico - Fitness, strength and conditioning, mixed martial arts, mindset, jiu jitsu, squats, deadlifts


The Mentality of Fighting

After getting pummeled a couple of times, you get used to it, then you definitely form of adore it. It assists in keeping you humble, exposes flaws in your methodology and you’re feeling like you’ll be able to deal with the rest. But, it hurts like hell. The punches do not harm in an instant, issues simply move dim for a millisecond, like a flickering lightbulb.


The ache units in a few hours later when your face blows up as though you were given stung by means of a thousand wasps. Getting punched or kicked to the torso hurts in an instant. It appears like you’ll be able to’t breathe and all your frame radiates with an indescribable throbbing. Eventually, my trainer began making widespread journeys to Japan and used to be much less to be had for instruction, so I used to be off to search for a new faculty.


Through my paintings as a private Trainer, I met my new trainer. He used to be a just right fighter, teacher, and he took a liking to me. He invited me over to his gymnasium to coach along with his guys, to which I answered, “I only do privates.” I informed him why and he laughed it off, however no longer in the, “you’re a chicken” form of manner, however in the “my guys will take care of you—don’t worry” form of manner.


He rented out house in a racquetball gymnasium known as “CardioFit.” It had 4 or 5 racquetball courts downstairs and wrestling mats and heavy baggage upstairs. The entire gymnasium smelled like sweat and pee. I started doing workforce categories, constructed some friendships, and my abilities as a fighter persevered to give a boost to.



One of the men, Wesley, in reality sought after to struggle. Like I stated previous, MMA wasn’t technically prison, so if we needed to compete, we would have to visit the ends of the Earth, and that supposed Mexico. Word were given round, and ahead of I knew it, a workforce folks had been in a position for Total Combat IV.


The tournament used to be held July 24, 2004, on the Baby Rock Night Club in Tijuana, Mexico. The major tournament used to be an alleged Neo-Nazi in opposition to a man with Native American blood. I am not kidding. The former had the “SS” bolts tattooed on his arm, and the latter had “NATIVE” tattooed on his abdomen.


I will be able to’t ascertain whether or not the only used to be a real Nazi or if the opposite used to be a legit Apache, however it offered tickets. Another guy at the card went directly to turn out to be a famend fighter for the UFC. There used to be additionally a man who’s lately serving a existence sentence for twenty-nine prison counts. And then there is me.


We parked our automotive in this tiny automobile parking space and walked thru a massive turnstile with the signal “THIS WAY TO MEXICO” or one thing, above. I wasn’t in Kansas, anymore. I had by no means been presented gum such a lot of instances in my existence.


Did my breath scent that dangerous? One of my Mexican teammates informed me to by no means acquire any as a result of if I did, they might by no means depart me on my own. I did really feel like a jerk for announcing “no, gracias” to the children.


I used to be amazed on the stuff it is advisable to acquire there, despite the fact that the joys pieces it is advisable to by no means take again around the border. I do not imply pinatas and maracas, I am speaking brass knuckles and butterfly knives. If you might be unfamiliar with butterfly knives, they’re necessarily folding pocket knives, and tremendous unlawful. You additionally run the chance of chopping your self huge open if you do not know find out how to spread it as it should be. I reduce myself cutting peppers, I believe I will go.


As we walked down Avenida Revolucion, I spotted a few issues. First, the entire native males hated us. Second, the native ladies liked us. Third, there have been a lot of stray canine. We handed a number of bars, every one promising inexpensive and less expensive beverages. I believe one bar marketed lobsters, which I believed used to be unusual.


We made psychological notes as to which of them we would attend after the fights, assuming we were not killed in the nightclub. Finally, we made it to the Baby Rock. Smoke, lasers, and go-go dancers surrounded a ring planted in the middle of the construction. Not a cage, however a ring. I believe the cage used to be too pricey.


We had a massive workforce, however handiest a few folks had been “cornermen.” That supposed lets move behind the scenes, lend a hand our guys heat up and be with them at ringside. Coach would give you the bulk of the directions and I used to be most commonly there for ethical fortify and hang the spit bucket. My mother sought after me to be a physician, an engineer, or a attorney. But, right here I used to be, in Mexico, preserving a spit bucket for my good friend, looking to keep away from eye touch with any person who might be related to the Cartel.


The fights had been a blur. We had been behind the scenes more often than not and did not get to look at any of them. We’d handiest see them upon access and go out. The name is going out, “Wes and Michael—you’re up!” That’s us. We input the hoop to the Steppenwolf music, “Magic Carpet Ride.” Maybe Wes would have picked Pantera, Motley Crue, or NWA.


Still, it used to be a just right music. During the struggle, Coach shouted directions and the inebriated crowd known as for blood. I felt like I used to be looking at chess. I stood there, in awe of what I used to be seeing. Looking again, it used to be most commonly unrefined, however on the time, it used to be fantastic. It used to be the entire strikes and methods we discovered in coaching, being hired in a real struggle—and our man used to be successful.


Two mins into the second one spherical, the referee noticed that the opposite man used to be no longer intelligently protecting himself, and known as an finish to the struggle. Fight one used to be over. Fight two: are we able to get out of Mexico alive? We exited the construction without a issues, and it felt like clean crusing from there. Wrong. Enter: Charles “Mask” Lewis. Mask used to be the founding father of the unique attire line for MMA, Tapout. He and his companions offered shirts, shorts, and stickers out of doors MMA occasions from the again in their van.


Today, the WWE holds a 50% stake in the emblem. Incredible. Unfortunately, Mask used to be struck and killed by means of a inebriated motive force in 2009. He used to be posthumously inducted into the UFC Hall of Fame, and his title has a everlasting position at the UFC Octagon. On the night time of July 24, 2004, he used to be alive, greater than existence, and about to make my existence extra attention-grabbing.


“Stay sharp, I think those guys want to go.” Go did not imply “leave,” it supposed they sought after to struggle, just like the Jets and the Sharks, with out the faucet dancing. And what guys? Why? It’s highest to not ask any questions. Not handiest used to be I no longer in clinical faculty, like my mother sought after, however I used to be additionally about to get killed in a gang struggle.


You could also be considering, “just run away” or “try and talk sense into everyone.” The History books would eternally say: “Impromptu gang fight breaks out in Mexico, Amir Mofidi runs away.” Or, “in an attempt at diplomacy, Amir Mofidi stands between the two angry mobs, gets his head smashed with a bottle and spends the remainder of the fight on the ground, bleeding from the skull.”


I will be able to believe, sitting on a rocking chair, chatting with my grandkids, telling them to get up for themselves, and one of the vital little smartasses asking, “But, Pop-Pop, didn’t you run like a chicken from a fight in Mexico?” No, thanks.


In America, when the police arrive, issues have a tendency to relax. I believe Mexico performs by means of other laws. When the Federales display up, they shake you down for how much cash you’ve got on you, then they nonetheless throw you in prison. There’s a funny story in the film Airplane, “have you ever been in a Turkish prison?” I have never, however there used to be a actual chance I would finally end up in a Mexican prison. Do you even get a telephone name?


A humorous factor occurs when two teams of fellows stare every different down in the center of the road, about to salary warfare. They both beat the crap out of one another or they turn out to be pals. We changed into pals. I nonetheless had no concept what the unique pork used to be, however now I am embracing overall strangers and making amends, everybody taking turns and announcing “my bad, bro.”


They insisted that we sign up for them in celebrating our new alliance on the closest bar, over some watered-down alcohol. Now, if you are street-smart, you’ll be able to scent one thing suspicious. It’s a entice. It took place to me as soon as out of doors a Peppino’s in Anaheim, so I used to be hip to the rip-off. They trap you in beneath the basis of friendship, and the following factor you realize, you might be surrounded by means of extra of them, without a break out—fish in a barrel.


I whispered to Coach and Mask that this might be a trick, they usually nodded in approval. With a motion of the pinnacle, I had earned my street-cred, and unofficially changed into promoted throughout the workforce. Instead of following them in like lemmings, we approached cautiously, like ninjas. We walked upstairs to the bar-slash-dancefloor; it used to be too overdue to show again. A final-minute trade of center would possibly spark a struggle proper then and there.


What used to be looking ahead to us on the best of the steps? A lonely DJ, a couple of locals and a small workforce of Americans who headed over the border to birthday party. We drank some crappy beer and shared some laughs. Nothing’s funnier than “oh man, we were about to kill each other. Isn’t that hilarious?” I in reality sought after to move house. Fight two: staying alive in Mexico used to be whole. That brings us to struggle 3: will they let me again into America?


Remember, it used to be 2004, 3 years got rid of from 2001. Believe me once I say: I by no means skilled any bigotry or prejudice following the tragedy of September, 11. But, that does not imply getting again around the border can be a cinch. Airport safety is obnoxious, however I do not really feel the similar about border safety. I wasn’t smuggling the rest however a burning need to get again to our automotive and kiss the concrete flooring. I will be able to’t say the similar for everybody else. All it takes, is for one uninspected backpack will get over the border and San Diego is going bye-bye.


“ID please.” Great. This goes to be awkward. I’d have killed to had been named Scott Johnson. At least my circle of relatives did not have an affinity for syllables. Otherwise, my title can have learn: Amir Mohammadpourkarkaragh. I would be “randomly checked” for the remainder of my existence. Did I point out I had a shaved head and a mean-looking goatee?


“What brought you into Mexico?”

“Fighting.” Not a just right get started. “I mean MMA.”

“What’s MMA?”


“Boxing. You a boxer?”

“No, sir.”

“Have anything to drink tonight?”

“Yes, sir, two beers.” Two is normally my upper-limit.

“Any drugs?”

“No, sir.”

“Ok, step aside, we’re going to search you.”


I do not do medicine, however when you are about to be searched, you get started getting paranoid that you are in truth sporting some. The officer accomplishing the hunt nods to the opposite officer preserving my ID that I am blank, however he may not give my card again. He seems to be on the card, again to me, then backtrack, then reluctantly fingers it again. “Go ahead.”


“Thank you, sir. Have a good evening.” I do not get the “give the police a hard time” mentality. I sought after to move house. I don’t believe I ever returned to Tijuana, however I will be able to’t ensure it is the ultimate time I did one thing unhealthy.


Defining Safe Versus Unsafe

What used to be unhealthy about that night time? Well, a lot. Ironically, MMA used to be the least unhealthy. Compared to boxing, or soccer, the harm charge according to hour of festival is remarkably low. That does not imply invulnerable to harm, however a ways lower than you’ll assume.


Even in its inchoate days, warring parties were not inspired to overcome every different to loss of life. Organizations sought after MMA to turn out to be sanctioned in states like New York and California. They knew that having a listing of useless our bodies would derail their reason in an immediate.


Therefore, referees were not negligent they usually regularly stopped fights early, to the dismay of the competition and the bloodthirsty crowd. Sure, the tactics and techniques had been much less delicate, once in a while inconsiderate, however that is advanced since then. Although the night time used to be “unsafe,” the Mixed Martial Arts weren’t.


No two workout routines have the stigma of “unsafe” greater than squats and deadlifts. I do not know the way time and again I have needed to dispel the myths that squatting or deadlifting is dangerous for this-or-that. They aren’t with out chance, however they don’t seem to be the perilous time-bombs that folks assume they’re.


MMA is not unhealthy, the best way we went about it that night time, used to be unhealthy. The identical holds true for the general public who squat and deadlift. Truthfully, it is onerous to name what they do “squatting” and “deadlifting.” They glance extra like seizures with weights. It’s no marvel that knee ligaments tear and discs get blown out. The manner many of us move about doing them—is unhealthy.


Squats and deadlifts are two of crucial and advisable workout routines you’ll be able to do. For clinical causes, some want to keep away from them, however that is a minority of folks. I am nonetheless younger, however there are a lot of miles on my frame. I will be able to’t workout with the similar depth and quantity I may when I used to be more youthful, nor do I wish to.


The identical is going for MMA. I do not wish to get punched in the face, anymore. But, I nonetheless grapple steadily and move in opposition to more potent, more youthful, and sooner guys. In the tip, it is the methodology that both saves my butt or kicks theirs. Squatting and deadlifting correctly calls for methodology and finesse. Leave the extraordinary one-rep-maxes to the younger and the aggressive powerlifters. Don’t get me flawed, you’ll be able to move heavy—heavier than you assume—however keep technical.


It’s the methodology that can save your again, your knees, and make you like the ones workout routines up to I do. Now, move do a correct set of squats ahead of they get banned for being “unsafe,” and we need to move to Tijuana to do them.

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